Jailhouse EtiquetteThis is a featured page

So you can distinguish a salad fork from a dinner fork. No one cares in the big house! Same goes for knowing proper cocktail-party attire and the importance of sending thank-you notes. But that doesn't mean, dear Paris, that you can let proper etiquette slide while incarcerated. You just need to adjust those Manhattan manners by following these tips:
  1. Do your own time. Called the golden rule of prison, this roughly translates as, "Mind your own business."

  2. "Don't flash money or property around," advises Shaun Attwood of the excellent big-house blog Jon's Jail Journal. If an alpha inmate sees you with something fancy that she fancies, she'll just take it from you. If you have toothpaste, hair gel, or something you can share, word to the wise: Share it.

  3. Don't do drugs. It's one thing to dabble in the outside world, but getting involved with narcotics in jail adds another level of complication. For one, you don't want to run up any IOUs you can't remedy: "More people die from being unable to pay drug debts than for any other reason," Jon warns. Second, you need to keep your sober wits about you. Third, why risk getting caught? Finally, who knows what you can catch from dirty needles, pipes, etc.

  4. Show some 'tude to the guards. Better to read in US Weekly about some warden who griped that you were sassy and noncooperative than to have Roz and Marge reckon that you're pals with the Man. The warden doesn't share your shower.

  5. Respect the long-term residents. No one appreciates a three-weeker who whines about how long her sentence is. Also, don't ask about the length of a fellow inmate's sentence or the nature of her crime. That's rude, and very dangerous.

  6. Stand up for yourself. Establishing strength and cred is essential, so if someone picks on you or, heaven forbid, challenges you to a fight, you have no choice but to fight back. Once you're perceived as a weakling, the knives are (literally) out and it's very hard to erase those first impressions of softness.

  7. Respect other people's property. While you might think nothing of borrowing Nicole's cashmere hoodie without asking for permission, suppress the urge to sample your cellie's Triscuits. Don't touch other people's stuff ever. Even with permission. Seriously, don't do it.

  8. Don't attract the attention of the corrections officers, either when by yourself or with a group. This means moving slowly, keeping your voice down and not acting like a performer. This is one place you don't want to draw a crowd.



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Patty
Patty 		Latest page update: made by Patty , Jun 13 2007, 3:35 PM EDT (about this update About This Update Patty Edited by Patty


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